this mask of pain
is just my face
when the daily silence
of the fire beneath our feet
slips
again
jaw jacked wide
tears spurting like an amputation
now I can’t stand
stomach punched
bowing, broken at the knees
sinking, life collapsing, twisting as a helix
but you
you’re wrapped, strapped
to my chest
breathing
holding you, I have to hold you
can’t fall into a foetal position
don’t wake now
my arms around you
the only strength I have
swallow down these choking howls
can’t let you see or hear
I let it in
have little choice
but this feels more real
than the noise
and then it’s passed
I wipe my face
back to the morning rising
nappy changes
pouring brexit into bowls
taking out the bins
and
on my bike
leaving who I love for another day
at the coalface of LEDs
Written in the early hours of Thursday 13 June 2019, reflecting on the announcement that the UK will adopt a net zero target of 2050.